Where My Girls At?

Not only is this one of my favorite songs of all time, it's a great title for my blog. I was having a conversation with my bestie the other day and she was telling me about how none of her friends talk to her very much since she got married. She said she kinda feels out of the loop of things and rarely sees some of her old good friends. That got me thinking...

I wonder why that is the case? I explained to her that not only did that ring true for me also after I was married but ESPECIALLY after I got pregnant and then after Betsy came home from the hospital....what friends?? And it's not just me, apparently it's Tony too. I don't remember the last time he was invited to go to a movie, Thunder game, ANYTHING, with his friends (that I am aware of) and that makes me so sad. It's not like we are different people. Yes, we have responsibilities now and we have different priorities but that doesn't mean we don't like to go out, with friends, without each other and have a good time. Everyone likes to have fun still, whether you are married and it's an especially nice break when you have a child.

It's weird, looking back, how many friends I lost after I got married. Sure, I didn't enjoy the 'single life' anymore and going to clubs and/or bars was the last thing I wanted to do. But is that ALL there is to do? No. Why not a movie, go to dinner, anything!! I just wonder what goes through the minds of these so-called-friends that makes it okay to drop us out of their friendship loop after we have quote-unquote grown-up???? I needed my friends. I needed my friends then and I need my friends now. I cherish all my friends that I have made since we have been together and I'm blessed to have the ones who have been in my life for a while.

I couldn't tell you how many people jumped all in our band-wagon when I was pregnant with the triplets. Everyone who was everyone wanted to be our friends but as soon as I was home from the hospital, it was like no one called. Didn't know what to say to me? Maybe. It still hurt. It made it seem like these people only wanted to be around to marvel at our trio. Silly, I know but that is how it felt. And so many people just didn't know how to act or what to say and I understand that totally. But a friendship doesn't always have to be about words. Sometimes it's what you don't say that hurts.