Friday, April 22, 2011

Time Warp

Well it's Easter weekend, which always reminds me of my journey to parenthood and everything we went through. It was Easter 3 years ago that I had my IVF transfer and we joked that my fertility doctor "hid" eggs inside me. Little did we know how those three little Easter blessings would change and alter our lives forever. I still remember every tiny detail about everything we went through and every single emotion I experienced. It's as though it just happened and it's been 3 years. When I look at my journal from the day I had my transfer, I wrote that my doctor told me I had a 60% chance of getting pregnant with one baby. I wrote "I hope they all 3 stick and I have triplets".

It's a miracle in itself that it happened and I did have triplets. I was told my egg quality wasn't even that good and that is why he decided to implant three instead of just two as to give me a better shot of even having one.

So I guess over time it DOES get easier...just the little things. Every single month is an anniversary of something. The transfer...the pregnancy test...the ultrasound...the heartbeats...etc. It all starts around Easter time and goes all the way to Christmas..the anniversary of Betsy coming home from the hospital and another Christmas with two less stockings by the tree.

But I have noticed that holidays and anniversaries are starting to focus more on the blessing of Betsy and less on what we don't have. I know it should have been that way all along, we are so blessed to have Betsy, but it's hard when you have lost two of your children. We enjoy every moment we have with her. We know how much of a miracle she truly is and we praise the Lord for that every single day. Grace and Olivia are always, always in our hearts. My three sweet Easter eggs.


Daysha said...

You have and are walking your journey very well!